If there's one term that sums up the experience of being fat its sobriety. Fatness is sober.
There's no running away, no escape, no holiday from you. No heightened perception, no visual/auditory hallucination, no euphoria, no preternatural calm, no disruption of co-ordination, no nightmares, no bad trips, no supernatural energy, gurning, palsy, maniacal tics, no desire to fight, no dutch courage, no plummeting lows, no tremulous shakes, no paranoia, no river of sweats...........
...........Just being whatever and whomever you are.
Being fat isn't like drug addiction, it is not like alcoholism, it is not like anorexia either, it's where the body takes you, when its made its calculations.
Food is not a drug. Food is a source of energy the body that it needs to maintain its existence. Drugs are not. Starvation is not. Vomiting is not. Only alcohol is. It's the closest one can come to any notion of "food addiction" only because it is also an intoxicant.
Food could only said to be "a drug of choice" in the way that a duvet could become a pony of choice if a person choose to form theirs into a pony like shape and imagined riding it to glory in the Grand National.
In your imagination only. With one like that it's probably best you stay away from actual drugs.
Those past the arbitrarily declared weight line have been denied a voice by a continuous effort of much trusted researchers and professionals to force them to act out the narrative construct they've conjured up.
This and the denial of actions and rejection of results-on the grounds that the latter did not match their holy hypothesis-has left a void within most fat/ter people where the unfettered sense memories of their experience should be.
That void is currently drawing a multi-pronged effort to fill it by getting people who aren't to see themselves as addicts/ alcoholics/anorexics.
Try to remember, professionals medicalisation along with hysterical pathologisation does not equal our lives.
To define anything, one must describe it according to its own characteristics and features. As this is not being done with weight-it might accidentally reveal something of use and we can't have that-it is described purely as other things, things it is not.
Weight is the representation of humans as mass. It is not something happening to an ethereal non-material idea of self, such basis is a religious hangover.
Seeking euphoria or having a system that succumbs to proto-anorexia does not define the life or experience of merely fat/ter people. And just as those not taking themselves for small shit, have been free [more or less] to construct their own narratives; drug addict-started for fun/to manage bad feelings/get through bad times, until their system succumbed and boom, they needed drugs to function. Alcoholic-one sip and it was where have you been all my life?/all my friends drank like me until they stopped and I didn't-couldn't etc., etc.,
Have the grace to allow others to relay their own stories, such as they are, disregarding any attempt to switch one set of imposed falsehood for another.
No comments:
Post a Comment