Sunday, 21 April 2013

Using Negativity

It's getting increasingly hard to ignore the fact that people cultivate negativity to use it to achieve their ends. Can we just lance that boil by saying this?


Because hiding behind the insistence that this is wholly enforced by the media/patriarchy etc., will no longer do as a convenient fiction.

It was okay as long as we all professed self loathing. But when some outrageously decided nuts to that. An unexpected backlash was unleashed.

"That's unfeminine". "Women must hate ourselves to be authentic, real, genuine". "It's not possible for a woman to like herself." "You'll totally fail". "It's an insult not to respect my self loathing, by not mentioning anything about appreciating ones body". Then there's, stating the intent to move in that direction means you are; a) boasting that you've achieved it perfectly.  And b) are now a hypocrite, as you are not matching my ideas of what self love is.
Even though I've said no woman possibly could.

And perhaps least favourite of all; "It's easy for you to like your body." Really? I hadn't noticed. But I am glad.

There's just no way this is for real.

Clearly folks have been taken by surprise by fat people's complete exhaustion with a self annihilating, self erasing, self disdain.

Being brought up to believe fat is bad means that it is something you don't have to make your mind up about. It just is. It's a rock. A comfort. Security. When that is challenged, everything changes. You become aware there's a choice. That is upsetting.  It feels like being unmasked. It was agreed, we have no choice. A sure sign of feeling ashamed of one's decision.

Not surprisingly, as doing yourself down goes against your survival code. Perhaps even your sense of personal honour to always keep the faith with yourself even if all doubt you. There's an expectation that you'll be a friend  to yourself, always. 

But if negativity is what you want, why not come to terms with that? Rather than adding shame to the mix?

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