Monday, 28 December 2009


I was reading about a take down of the idea of a woman's gay best friend. And I must say I'm glad that cliche's being punctured.

In The Second Sex, Simone de Beauvoir says that after the menopause, it could be argued that women, biologically speaking are no longer women in the way that tends to be defined.  They're not men either, obviously, because a woman is not a default man, nor vice versa.

Others focus on the potential insult value to gay men. But I've always found there is something inherently patriarchal about the way gay men are supposed to be the ones to resolve women's purported estrangement to their 'femininity'.

And there's the usual idea that gay men are somehow feminine. I've not been convinced of that since years ago, I began to question that. I'm not sure that what seems feminine on a man would be on a woman, but nevermind. 

There's something rather commodifying about defining gay men in terms of their purported usefulness in arranging women's lives to get more out of their heterosexuality.

Like many gay men, I do not accept there's any underlying connection between women and gay men apart from the estrangement from their own autonomy imposed by the great chore of hetereomasculinity

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